Sorry I haven't posting as much, have you ever change your mind? I have, it happens... seems to be happening alot lately......
So here is my long await New Year's Revolution(s)...
Jump with me, will ya...
Let's start off with the one I mentioned on Facebook...
New Year's Revolutions
#1) Change a seemingly unchangeable truth!
What exactly does THAT mean? Well, how many of you readers know me in real life?...
I am sadly single... and yes, there is one person that I know I would give my right(dominant) arm just to be with her......... or at least I used to. I sat down with myself... and I figured this out. Hope is supposed to be the greatest expectation in life. But what if you feel your only hope was wrapped up in someone who seems to enjoy shattering it? I know I'm not in any position to negotiate, mainly because each of us has a right to believe whatever he or she wants to......... but I would like to be acknowledged... DO NOT just ignore my feelings, especially when I've been as understanding as a person can be, without blowing up from the pain building up inside.............. being ignored like that makes it that to one person who treats me like a phantom the most is the one that calls me her best friend.............
Then it hit me......... the seemingly unchangeable truth...... there are two...... I know this person well enough to know what's in her heart... and I know what she's afraid of...... and that leads me to these unchangeable truths: 1) the only thing worse than knowing is never finding out at all & 2) there is living to fight another day and there is learning to walk away.........
And that is New Year's Revolution #1...... one of those WILL be confirmed... one of those WILL be changed......... BOTH will be accepted...... as ominous as that sounds, I'm sure people that actually know me will know exactly what I mean......
All this time wondering what might've been, or what could be...... and I'm the only one of the two that cares(or so it seems)... at least, by my understanding...... and while she's having such a wonderful life(with an asshole that doesn't deserve her), I'm stuck trying to move on and still be a best friend............ leads me to wonder... if... moving on... means walking away...........
Is there still time? Of course, nothing is set in stone...... but something has got to give before a particular date, or the wrath of the Shadowheart will be felt by all of those involved!!!!!!!!!!!!! Or...... just a time to talk about things......
Now, while this is in my mind, the hope for new love is there, and I'm seriously working on it...... but any of you that is remotely human knows that sometimes you need help to take the first few steps......... it's difficult when it seems no one is willing to take that chance with me.......
What's in the future with this? I dunno...... Time will tell the story...... but this time, this story has a deadline......
#2) A certain person will feel my wrath!
Who exactly? This pertains to #1...... how do you spell her name? Jenny... Jenni... Jennie...... Jennie-O, as in the brand of turkey........
Soon, the turkey might be receiving a piece of my mind...... I'd give her the whole piece, but I'm sure she can only comprehend a small piece...... that and a small piece is hard to detect......
No talking me out of it... no negotiation......... those that deserve it, shall receive it...
#3) I'm going to rebuild my walls!
What walls? The walls around my heart... my soul...... I've let too many people in, and certain people need shut out... the more I see my hopes taken from me, the worse my hatred of people becomes... BUT instead of just letting it go like I have been, these walls will be reconstructed just for the purpose of keeping that hatred in, just like I used to in High School and while I was with Arley...... and let that caged hatred turn into the beast that I miss so much...... he was my pet... I named him Skippy......
Simply put, if you don't have permission, you're not getting in... or Skippy will eat your soul...
#4) To take control!
It's time that this Shadowheart takes control of who he is...... picks himself up... and kicks a few doors down(or teeth in)...... I'm going to kick this depression... I'm gonna get me a good woman... I'm going to live my life... It's time that I finally finish my Circle for good......
#5) Going to blog more!
I think I have found some of my lost words... I have more in storage...... I had more for this one, but I played nice...... I didn't completely speak my mind tonight, mainly because when the time comes, I will(almost like a blogging ninja, wait for it, right timing, then...... WHAM!!! or SLICE!!!)
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Yes, that's right, you heard me, I held back...... why? You will see soon...... I have a special post coming in the next few days referencing two articles I've read......
And yes, it WILL be an FTW post...... I'm SO excited, and I just can't hide it. I'm about to lose control, and I think I like it!!
So, there are 5 New Year's Revolutions... I posted 5, because the rate of keeping one is pretty bad, ask all those people who JUST gave up on their gym memberships...... but with 5, one is bound to work out... so, don't expect me to follow through on all of them(I know you know which ones I'm talking about), but at least you have an idea of what going on in my idea factory I hide in my head......
And if you are angry at this post or offended... good...... come back once the FTW post is finished, and I will take care of most of the rest of you......
The time is now... Enough is Enough and it's time for a change...
The Time Will Come..............
~The Master Has Returned
Note: If you have questions or concerns, feel free to let me know, and if it not disrespectful, you will be answered in a timely fashion. All other questions, concerns, or comments... go fuck yourself...
Thank you for you time...
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